My Weekend of Sobriety #1

As I mentioned before, I’m trying not to drink because I experience the inability to stop once I do. And that, my friends, is no good.

Josef went up to Helen without me this weekend, and I enjoyed a leisurely weekend took our son’s weekend schedule under my wing. Although, I did hire a sitter Friday night and got in some good time with old friends. Back in the day I sang in an a cappella group that I loved for most of the time I was in it. Then it stopped being fun and I quit. Another girl from the group left at some point and joined another a cappella group that was doing music more in line with her style. And another girl from the group quit, too; she and I went to see the girl in her newer group perform and it was awesome! I’m so happy for her. Their group is so good and I didn’t want the show to end.

The show was at a bar. I drove (despite my fear of not being able to find parking) and only drank a Coke. So I still had the calories of a drink, I suppose, but I only had one, you guys. Stop judging.

Saturday I took the little dude (who was all HELLO WORLD!!!! at 5:30 am!!!!) to a place in town at a mall with indoor inflatable games. He looooooved it, putting it lightly. One of his classmates from school and her mother joined us. We went to lunch in the food court. Not the most relaxing lunch I’ve ever had, but the place was super empty so it was okay. There were only two options for lunch — that’s how empty.

We did absolutely nothing on Saturday night. It was lovely. Little dude tuckered out pretty early after his exciting day and I was able to watch some Netflix before heading to bed pretty early myself.

Sunday, I went to church with the same friends from the day before, and it was nice! It took all of 4 minutes to drive there, we didn’t have to dress as nicely as we do for the church we’re members of, and the congregation there is very progressive and openly emotional about all the stuff going down in our nation currently. I helped teach Sunday school so my son would be more comfortable, and that was fun. The service was mostly fun — my son ran around and shouted a bit more than was comfortable for me. Luckily, he’s pretty cute so folks kept telling me it was totally okay. We took our kids back to a room where they could play with toys on some other adult volunteers’ watches, so we could go back listen to the sermon. It felt so good to be at church. It did not feel so good to not really know this congregation, which prompts me to figure out — do I get to know this congregation, try out some other places, suck it up and stay where we got married and our son baptized? This is to say, what church is best for us in town, as we will still be gone a great deal on the weekends.

My son and I went out to lunch after that, as I had a massive headache and couldn’t deal with making lunch right then. He wanted noodles so we got Thai — my fave. The portions were huge so leftovers for dinner! Josef returned in time for dinner.

I really didn’t want to drink, surprisingly. I figure it has to do with not usually being in Atlanta over the weekend. I hope the success of this weekend can help me not want to drink next weekend. I think it will be hard as I’ll be back in Helen, among a lot of people who like to drink, and there are parties going on where alcohol will be a focus. Even people pretending to be Bavarians love them some bier und wein. Maybe I will discover a love of Shirley Temples or something.

I expressed some of my current issues to my friend who attended the show with me on Friday night. She is so wise, and she gave me some advice she’d gleaned from a mentor in her life: it’s not a light switch, it’s a journey. I shouldn’t expect instant gratification, even though everyone says I am doing all the right things to take care of myself: therapy, meds, exercise, and now not drinking.

Phew, this journey is full of trials and tribulations, but I have to muddle through so I can see where this journey takes me. I think I am not quite where I need to be in the journey to set goals. I’m just trying to feel better right now.

Thanks for reading.

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